Mets Med School

by Tim Reilly July 23, 2018 0 Comments

Nothing to see here, just Noah Syndergaard hitting the DL with hand, foot and mouth disease. And here I thought foot and mouth disease was only something the team brass and Mickey Callaway were dealing with of late. 

Just when you think the Mets have hit rock bottom they find a way to reach new lows. Darren sent a tweet out last night with just a few of the Mets illnesses that have shelved guys throughout the years.  

You can basically pass medical school by being a Mets fan. pic.twitter.com/Q5EyhWoTOR

— The 7 Line (@The7Line) July 23, 2018

When you think about it, one season following the Mets HAS to be the equivalent to a year at med school. In all seriousness, I’ve learned far more about the human body from the Mets than any doctor I’ve ever seen. I feel like I could take the MCAT today without having to study.

They say memory tools are the best way to prepare for tests. Well, let’s take a walk down memory lane with a list that not even the best sitcom writers could come up with… 

• Noah Syndergaard (2018) – Hand, foot and mouth disease / Noah did a good deed and spent time at a kids camp. No good deed goes unpunished. 

• Yoenis Cespedes (2018) - Calcification in both heels / It's always a good sign when your workhorse can't stand on his heels.

• Brandon Nimmo (2017) – Collapsed lung / I find it hard to breathe when watching this team too, Brandon.

• Hansel Robles (2017) - Pinched genitals

Robles had numbness in fingers pitching the ninth. In the eighth he landed awkwardly and pinched his genitals, prompting Ray Ramirez visit.

— Mike Puma (@NYPost_Mets) August 3, 2017

• Matt Harvey (2016) - Thoracic Outlet Syndrome / I still don't understand what this is.

• Matt Harvey (2016) – Bladder Infection / Harvey had a hard time going pee-pee.

• David Wright (2015) – Spinal Stenosis / This is cruel and unusual punishment for Captain America. 

• Dillon Gee (2012) – Blood Clot / Gee went from the modern day Rick Reed to donezo after this scare.

• Ike Davis (2012) – Valley Fever / I'm still not convinced Davis wasn't just perpetually hungover.

• Angel Pagan (2011) - Ulcerative colitis / As someone with Crohn's, I can confirm that Pagan was not full of shit when ailing from Colitis.  

• Kaz Matsui (2008) – Unnatural anus skin tear - Talk about a real pain in the ass.... 

• Ryan Church (2008) – Post Concussion Syndrome / It's amazing to think back on how poorly this was handled as we learn more about concussions from the NFL

• Jason Isringhausen (1997) – Tuberculosis / Izzy is the 1/1,000,000 case that gets the side effect you always hear on drug commercials 

…and that doesn’t even tip the iceberg when it comes to injuries.

I mean, look at that list again. The Mets don’t need a trainer, they need a Chief of Medicine sitting on the bench. I understand some things are just out of your control, but no team should be introducing its fan base to illnesses at the rate the Mets do. 

When I think about all the money I’ve spent on tickets, food and beers over the years, it probably does equate to Med school. Yet with all that “schooling,” I haven’t heard what the diagnosis is for the illness us fans have that continue to come back for more year-after-year…

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